Unleashing inspiration and fantasies from ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’

Milla Impola

Whether you see it in a park, a bus, a sandwich shop or in class, “Fifty Shades of Grey” continues its sexual revolution across America and the world, still arousing and creating fantasies in the minds of those who read it. Erotic stories, not just visual pornography, can turn you on like wildfire.

While many see the novel as sex-positive and one that sparks new conversations around sexuality, other discussions have emerged around the unhealthy relationship between protagonist Anastasia Steele and lover Christian Grey. In an article for Forbes, journalist and author Kathryn Casey said that a man like Grey, “who needs to dominate, humiliate and physically abuse a woman isn’t a hero” and “isn’t the man of any woman’s dreams.”

Despite any controversy the book may have caused for some individuals, there are still lessons about human sexuality we can take away from this novel by E.L. James. To honor the Oct. 27–28 Texas Book Festival, here are my favorite aspects of “Fifty Shades of Grey:”

1.  BDSM play: BDSM stands for bondage, discipline/domination, submission/sadism and masochism. “Fifty Shades of Grey” helped bring BDSM play out of the taboo closet and into the mainstream world, fostering conversations that can help curious partners discuss and explore the world of BDSM play. Although BDSM can include rough sex-play, from spanking and nipple clamps to games with hot wax, this type of sex-play is not meant to physically or mentally hurt your partner but rather to create a mutually respectful, enjoyable sexual experience for all parties involved. One of the most important parts of BDSM play are “safe words.” Steele chose the word “popsicle” in “Fifty Shades of Grey.” These words need to be fully respected and listened to by sexual partners, because they help your partner understand the difference between pleasure and pain.

2. Awakening your fantasy land: Sexual fantasies and dreaming about having sex with someone else, such as Grey or Steele (or both), can be a completely healthy and rewarding activity. A study published in 2001 in “The Journal of Sex Research” found that 98 percent of men and 80 percent of women said they had fantasized about someone other than their primary partner in the previous two months. Whether you’re a student in college or a mother of three, fantasies can open your mind to secret realms of your sexual desires without crossing any boundaries in your everyday life.

3. Love for sex toys: Sex toys can help add that extra vibration to your sex life, whether we’re talking about ball gags, whips or vibrators. The Chicago Tribune reported that ever since the “Fifty Shades of Grey” phenomenon, Good Vibrations increased sales of bondage sex toys by 65 percent while Babeland increased its sales by 40 percent. 

Erotica, of course, should not end with “Fifty Shades of Grey.” The Daily Beast shared a collection of similar books to expand your library of sexy stories. Exploring your sexuality, whether through books, BDSM, sex toys, fantasies or beyond, is a worthwhile quest to make.

Printed on Wednesday, October 24, 2012 as: 'Fifty Shades of Grey' inspires ideas for sex