I have no idea what I'm doing.

I used to think I did. I had a plan: I was going to be a journalist, starting as a news reporter for The Daily Texan. Suffice it to say, this is the first and only thing I will write for the Texan, though I’ve designed more pages than I can count. I used to think I wouldn’t stay long. Five semesters later…well, I think that speaks for itself. I used to think picas were annoying and eight hours a night was way too long to work. Now, I realize picas are a saving grace and eight hours isn’t nearly long enough.

I used to think I’d make a friend or two at work. Instead, I found a family of the most tireless, canny, driven people I think I will ever meet.  

My time here has been filled with love, laughter, and the unexpected. From designing Life&Arts special packages to messing with the sassy Sports guys; from bugging News about teasers and Photo about captions to arguing about where to get dinner every night; from playing M.A.S.H. and Hangman during maestro to designing BOBs and BOAs and timelines and infographics…and pretending like I knew what I was doing when, really, I never did. I don’t know whether I was ever really eligible for any position I held at the Texan, but I can without a doubt say I’ve been luckier than most because I can call the basement home.

Three days ago, I bought a plane ticket to Spain. It was a big decision, and one that means I won’t be putting my name on the “don’t worry, I’ll be back next semester” list like I have the past four. My nights of jamming to “P.Y.T. and “Sexotheque” with Kelly, Lillian and Iliana, watching Nick dance to “Hot Line Bling” and eating pints of ice cream with Aaron, are now officially over. My life of predesigning, redesigning, tracking in, tracking out, page edits and midnight deadlines have finally, after a long while, come to a close.

To the current design team – I’ve never had more fun. Y’all make me endlessly proud and I’ll miss each one of you. Nashwa – you’re quite simply the best. Keep stylin’. I’ll miss our cozy apartment. Megan – Tuesdays were my favorite day because of you and I cannot wait until next year. Kelly and Lillian – thanks for being my right (and left) hand. Don’t forget to Skype.  

Iliana – you’re the news to my paper. The basement is a better place with you in it and I’m a better person for knowing and loving you. You’re right – this will always be our thing.

And to Jack – thank you for being the long-haired fellow who inspired me to give design and this wild place a chance. Without you, I wouldn’t be the designer or person I am today.

It was never easy working for the Texan. I had no idea what I was doing half the time, and I honestly still don’t. In the end, all I know is – it was worth it. Even though I leave with a heavy heart, I know the Texan will always be there: a constant in someone’s life, if no longer in mine.

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