Going home for the holidays can be stressful, especially for those who become recluses on the Forty Acres. Facing people across the dinner table and knowing they may have voted against your personal beliefs and values is challenging. While booking bus tickets home for fall break, it is important to remember that you have a choice on how to engage in political discourse.
“The experience of going to college opens you up to a lot of new perspectives that maybe the people back home haven’t been exposed to,” said Mark Strama, director of the Annette Strauss Institute for Civic Life. “Your family didn’t change when you left, you did.”
Polarization in American politics has increased in the past decade along with discussions of whether this change should be welcomed or criticized. Aversion to the opposite party can have tense effects on family dynamics, even leading to shorter or more uncomfortable Thanksgiving dinners because of different political affiliations.
“Environments, polarization and toxicity in politics have amped up not only our own sensitivities and feelings around politics but (also) our friends’ and family members’ (feelings) back home,” Strama said. “It’s wise to approach those conversations with a deep breath and a lot of patience.”
As of March 2024, 45 million registered voters in reported areas identified themselves as Democrats and 35.7 million registered as Republicans, according to Ballotpedia. Demographics among both parties vary, so families are likely to be divided in some way. Gina Masullo, associate professor in the School of Journalism and associate director of the Center for Media Engagement, explains how politics can divide the community on both the national and familial scale.
“Most of us, as Americans, have some of both (political parties) in our families,” Masullo said. “It can be difficult when you’re disappointed to be around people who don’t share your disappointment or who are actually relishing in your disappointment.”
It is recommended that political conversations should be led by respectful dialogue. However, that doesn’t always happen. During heated political conversations, a person’s identity feels compromised — an emotional toll that is made more difficult around family.
“When you’re in those situations, it can be uncomfortable because you have a familial bond that dictates how you treat and relate to another person,” Talia Stroud, director of the Center for Media Engagement, said. “There are expectations of how you relate to family members, and in many families, that involves a deference to hierarchy and age and a respect there.”
The safest action may be to abstain from bringing up politics, but it may not be an option if it is prompted by another person.
“If the person bringing that discussion to you and you feel is bringing it in good faith and with curiosity and respect, engage at that level,” Strama said. “If you think that they’re looking to antagonize you, you’re not likely to have a productive or learning experience from that conversation.”
If you decide to engage in a respectful dialogue over the recent election, prioritize yourself first. Insults or personal attacks are not uncommon in these scenarios, but they can be especially hurtful when given by family. It is important to engage only if all parties are respectful of you and your beliefs and vice versa. Regardless of the approach, it is always a choice you have the power to make.
Lechner is a journalism sophomore from Rowlett, Texas.
